The Latest Kerry Katona Katie Price Argument


Kerry Katona Blasts Katie Price

Kerry Katona and Katie Price met in the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Jungle.  This was the classic series which Kerry won and in which Katie Price and Peter Andre became an item.  It seemed then that Kerry and Katie became friends. 


Two Peas in Different Pods

The women have a lot in common:  their jungle experiences such as eating live bugs to amuse television audiences, their partying lifestyles, motherhood and they both like a drink.  It is not surprising therefore that the two will fall out from time to time.  This is what happens when alcohol is at home.


Rumours, Lies and Insights

Rumour was that Kerry and Katie had a fall out after I’m A Celebrity get Me Out OF Here but then patched things up.  The rift was nowhere as big as Katie’s with Posh (David Beckham’s wife Victoria Beckham.  And, some would say, Kerry Katona  - who is often not in control of her life, has admitted to other drug habits, manic depression, weight gain and who married a man who essentially was in it for all he could get – is no threat to Katie Price. 


People Who Live in Glass Houses Should Not Throw Stones

Kerry, minus a couple of stones in weight, has recently made her latest comeback.  By that we don’t mean she has been taken back up by Farm Foods but she has been deemed worthy of fees for interviews in magazines such as OK! and their like.  This was a result for Kerry who was reported to be skint.  Unfortunately she didn’t use the coverage to do anything interesting… unless you count her slating of our eponymous heroine Katie Price.


Kerry is “Team Peter all the Way”

Kerry used her interview with OK! magazine to slate Katie.  She did this from her perspective of a woman who was totally in control (always) and who had never had any problems in her life.  In other words she did it from a fictitious perspective and from moral high ground which she had mistakenly clambered upon. 

Kerry recalled:

"I remember seeing a clip of Katie kick off at Pete and it was disgusting. I wouldn't have stood for it."

Yes, Kerry you’d only treat people with respect and wouldn’t allow them to treat you any other way NOT.  You wouldn’t marry someone who ripped you off and tipped of the press about your antics and where they were next going to take place.  You wouldn’t lop bricks at glass walls (so to speak).  Actually you would, would, would and would.

Nevertheless, Kerry continued: 

"[Katie] totally crucified him on a TV show talking about his b******s - I'm not surprised that he ended up leaving her."

Ding Ding End of Round One!

Katie Price and Alex Reid | News from Friends, Insiders and Sources

Katie Price and Alex Reid Today's News

Today's Katie Price and Alex Reid "news" comes from friends, insiders and sources.  All the friends, insiders and sources have one thing in common.  They are all unnamed.  They possibly have another thing in common - scrub that - they probably have one thing in common... this is that they are all fictitious.



Katie Price's Fictitious Friends say Katie wants to "Destroy Peter Andre"

This is an untrue story.  How do we know that it is untrue?  Because Katie Price (like all mothers in her situation - separated from the father of the children she adores) knows that if she actually does destroy Peter Andre she will damage her children.  That is why we believe that these stories emanate from a male hack who has no children.  This is just a theory but it has more validity than anything we have read about Katie Price and Alex Reid today.   That's not to say we can't have fun gathering our own "news" from unnamed, unsubstantiated and pretend sources...



Our News from an Unnamed Friend of Katie Price  

One unnamed friend said (words to the effect): "Katie wants to destroy Peter Andre.  She wants him to become a penniless old drunk, to put on weight, to become ill and end up living on the streets.  She wants his music career to fail miserably.  She wants him to lose his voice and sound like a croaking frog.  Katie is going to dish all the dirt on Peter Andre in her next biography.  She is busy collecting facts about him that will be so embarrassing that he'll have to go round in a veil and hide his sad face from the cameras.  She wants him to be a laughing stock.  She detests him".



A Katie Price Pretend Source Said and a Made Up Insider Added:

"Peter Andre was a complete stupid loony and Katie has decided to reveal all in her next book.  She'll tell everybody about the incident with the onion, the one with the roled up magazine and the one about the dinner plate.  Andre was so vain that he cracked several mirrors and went through more make up than she did and stole her eye liner.  A made up insider added: "Yes, Katie will reveal the truth about the doorstep and the bedside table"



Katie Price News is Total B*ll*cks!

It could be that gutter press and gutter online hacks are paying Katie's "friends, sources and insiders" for the "news" they supply about Katie Price but we all know that they wouldn't.  Unsubstantiated stories like the ones we have used above from a secret, insider, source who is a close pretend friend of Katie Price cost us... nothing but we could perhaps buy similar for our £1 budget.  The thing is they are all made up to serve their own purposes. These are to sell papers and articles to people with an appetite for celebrity drivel and the advertising space which surrounds them.  It is also so these fifth rate hacks can look busy.



How Gutter Hacks Look Busy

They sit at their desks and pretend to be on the telephone receiving insider information about Katie Price and other celebrities.  They say things like "really", "that's very interesting", "she did what?"  and "she said what?".  Then they look busy as they type out the first clap-trap that springs into their mostly empty heads.  Then it is off down the pub to meet a "source" who has some "insider information"

Katie Price is now Katie Reid

It was bound to happen. It could be said to do with her evolution as a person but is more likely to do with dominating the world's biggest search engine - namely Google. Let's first go through the Katie Price Search Saga:


Searching for Katie Price

At the start of her career Katie Price was Jordan. Anyone conversant with surfing and online searching in those days would have put Jordan into a search engine. They'd have found, among the stories about Jordan the country, information (valid or otherwise) about Jordan, which was in those days, the name preferred by Katie Price.


Jordan Became Katie Price

Subconsciously Jordan then reverted back to Katie Price.  People were still searching for Jordan but more people began to search for Katie Price.  What ever term they put into there Google Search box (Katie Price or Jordan) they were bound to find Katie Price.


Katie Price Became Katie Andre

For a while, about a week, Katie Price went by the name of Katie Andre.  This of course was after her wedding to Peter Andre.  Not many people searched for this term "Katie Andre" but if they did they would still find stories about Jordan or Katie Price so the name did give the celebrity more space in the Google search empire.


Katie Price is now Katie Reid

Katie Price is now (according to sources nobody can verify but also the latest episode of What Katie Did Next) going by the name of Katie Reid.  This means that you can put in the terms Katie Price, Jordan, Katie Andre or Katie Reid to a Google search box to locate stories about Katie Price or whatever her name is, was or will be in the future.


Does this Article Make Sense?

There is some sense to this article but not much.  This article was inspired by articles in leading newspapers.  Based on hardly anything but difficult to refute it is an homage to journalistic standards and we do not apologis for it.

New Cosmetic Range by Katie Price

Cosmetics for Adults


If there's one thing Katie Price knows about it is make-up.  We can't wait to test and trial her new range of cosmetics.  We hope the range is launched soon and will be sold alongside the Katie Price range of perfumes.


Katie Price Foundation and Spot Cover

She knows about how to hide spots and blemishes too which should be very informative when it comes to developing her name brand.  Occasionally, when watching What Katie Did Next an unflattering camera angle will reveal that the seemingly blemishless Katie actually has bad skin and a breakout of spot.  Her expertise in applying foundation, spot cover and face powder hides this 99% of the time.  We are sure that a foundation developed by someone who suffers the inconvenience of spots and bad skin will be much better than that developed by someone with no skin problems.


Katie Price Mascara


The trend for mascara (which Katie is on) is for super-huge eyelashes.  Katie achieves her long, thick lash look with false eyelashes and eyelash extensions.  Imagine a mascara which could achieve the same look without recourse to sticking false eyelashes to our eyelids?  If anyone can do it we are sure Katie Price will.


Katie Price Eye Shadow 


From what we have observed, Katie Price's preference is for natural colours on her eyelids.  We are unsure if this will be mimicked in her new range.  She has worn blue eye-shadow but this doesn't seem to suit her


Katie Price Make-Up for Children

We are sure that Katie Price will launch a range of makeup for children.  She said as much in the last episode of What Katie Did Next.  She seems to relish the controversy this move will rouse among some sections of the media but also seems to know that this will cut down on advertising costs.

Will Katie Price and Alex Reid Adopt a Child?

Standing OutAlex Reid Low Sperm Count

It is rumoured online that Alex Reid has a low sperm count.  This could be due to an injury suffered while cage fighting but could be for some other reason.  The press are saying that Alex and his ex did not have children despite never using contraception.  Of course, all this speculation might be due to the fact that Katie Price and Alex reid have been keeping a low profile and when that happens the press make up stories.  If Alex Reid does have a low sperm count, according to some speculators, it would explain why Katie has not yet announced her latest pregnancy.  Wrong!


Katie Price Could Be Pregnant

There is every chance that Katie Price (also known as Jordan) is already pregnant with Alex Reid's baby.  However, because her last pregnancy (while married to Peter Andre) which ended with a miscarriage it is highly probable that Katie will not announce her pregnancy until she has to.  


Will Katie and Alex Adopt?

If the couple cannot have their own child they might well adopt.  Despite everything written about Katie Price it is apparent to anyone who knows her and even to viewers of What Katie Did Next that the celebrity prioritises her children above all else.  Also, the fact that Katie did not insist on a prenuptial agreement with Alex, shows that this is a marriage built on love.  Based on this (and only this) and if all is true there is every possibility that Katie Price and Alex Reid would adopt a child.


Katie Price Shoes

Katie Price (the glamour model Jordan) loves shoes.  We've studied what sort of shoes she likes and made a selection for our Shoe Shop.  CLICK HERE to have a look at our Shoe Shop














Have Your Very Own U.S. Mailing Address

A New Hairstyle for Katie Price



Katie Price's New Hairdo

Katie Price – also known as Jordan – was wearing a new hairstyle when she flew in from LA and landed at Heathrow.  Katie often has hair done while she is in LA and, accordingly, as we expected her to be wearing a new head of single strand hair extensions when she came through customs we were quite surprised with her new look.


Katie’s New Hairstyle and New Look

Standing OutKatie was wearing her now signature black hair tied up in a loose bun.  Her new hairstyle made use of a wispy fringe.  She wore this with over sized designer black sunglasses and a shaggy fur collar.  The celebrity was sporting her usual deep brown fake tan.   Overall, the look was very après piste and 1960s.


Katie's Elton John Oscar Party Hairdo

At Elton John’s Oscar party Katie wore a similar style but far more precise and tidy.  The huge bun was probably padded out internally.  This version had no fringe as her hair was completely swept back.  We predict that this is the version which Katie will now be seen in more often.


Single Strand Hair Extensions and Hair Pieces

Of course, the bun might have hidden the full extent and full length of the hair extensions she now has.  Katie will still be able to perfect her recent long and big black hair look.  To do this she will wear her hair down and add the hair pieces 

Katie Price and Alex Reid Marriage is Illegal


The News of the World Reports that Katie Price and Alex Reid's Marriage is Illegal




The News of the World reported that the marriage of Katie Price and Alex Reid was illegal. News of the World investigative journalists found that the minister who performed the wedding ceremony was not properly licensed.  Without a proper licence the marriage would be null and void.


Wrong!

However, the News of the World got it wrong.  In a statement issued to the press by Katie Price’s people the “newspaper’s” investigation was shown to be lacking just one important element, that of complete validity.  The statement reads:


Katie Price Statement to the Press:

"Following the revelations in the press over the past couple of days regarding the validity of Katie and Alex's wedding, we would like to state that the marriage is 100 per cent legitimate and legal."

The Basis of the Katie Price Statement

The facts can be checked with The Wynn, (The Wynn was where the marriage ceremony took place), and with the office of the County Clerk Marriage Services Division in Las Vegas.  Also, this is not something which would have been overlooked in the planning of the wedding and, really, who would be stupid enough to marry famous celebrities without a proper marriage licence?  


Will Katie Price Sue the News of the World?

We’ll have to wait and see if Katie Price will sue the News of the World for publishing this about her wedding with Alex Reid.  The evidence of the News of the World’s mistake was published on Sunday 7th March so can’t be retracted.  Will Katie insist on a full apology?  Will she accept some good publicity in return for not taking the matter any further?  We’ll have to wait and see.


News of the World Journalistic Standards

We wondered if the News of the World investigative journalists who clearly had not checked out their facts with The Wynn nor the County Clerk Marriage Services Division in Las Vegas got paid for the story.  Any information on this aspect of the report into the illegal marriage of Katie Price and Alex Reid would be highly appreciated.

Katie Price Might Seek Advice from Infamous Agony Aunt

Wilma Proops Agony Aunt to the Stars





We are not sure if this report is true but we really hope it is because Wilma Proops dispenses the best advice to the stars, major and minor celebrities and even people like YOU!

You perhaps remember Wilma Proops.  She once fell over and revealed her bare arse to the world's press...  Here are some links to the advice she has dispensed in the past:


A Full List of Contents
  1. Introducing the Amazing Wilma Proops
  2. Help!  I've Gone Off Sex What Can I Do?
  3. I Made A Drunken Fool of Myself, Please help Me!
  4. How Much Perfume Should I Wear?
  5. Confess to Wilma
  6. Her Husband is a Slob! Can Wilma Help?
  7. Problems with Little Brothers Sorted
  8. Stupid, Rude, Inadequate Bosses - How to Cope with Them
  9. Help! I Need More Television
  10. Men with Sex Problems! Can Wilma Help Them?
  11. I'm Turning into a Slob - What Should I Do?
  12. Help with Problem Cats
  13. Wilma's Relationship Advice
  14. Wilma Wobbles Her Fat Away
  15. Unique FOREX Advice
  16. Dealing with Farting Children
  17. Wilma Arrested Campaigning for Gay Rights 
  18. Why is Everybody Always Picking on Me?
  19. Reefer Madness
  20. Start Wobbling YOUR Fat Away
  21. How to Laugh Out Loud
  22. How To Get Over Big Brother Withdrawal Symptoms
  23. Good Vibrations Made Me Slim
  24. I Dislike FaceBook Intensely!
  25. How to SAVE MONEY when Entertaining at Home
  26. The Real Truth about Tattoos
  27. Penis Tattoos
  28. How Come Wilma Proops Looks Better than Ever?
  29. All the Dirt on Aquarius Men
  30. The Difference between Gargoyles and Grotesques
  31. How to Deal with Immature Men
  32. How Can I Look Like Kylie Minogue?
  33. Getting Money Back from Rip Off Bankers
  34. Selling Your Soul to PlentyOfFish

Nipple Tassels for Katie Price




NIPPLE TASSELS - This Season's MUST HAVE!





Speculation is running high that Katie Price's next photo-shoot will see the glamour model sporting the latest fashion... nipple tassels.  Nipple tassels have been made popular by burlesque and pole dancers and most glamour models have their own nipple tassels nowadays.  These can be hugely expensive but it is possible to make your own.  Here are the instructions to make your own nipple tassels:



Make Your Own Nipple Tassels


To make nipple tassels for yourself or as a thoughtful gift for that special recipient, you will need:


Materials


  • Double sided tape
  • Sticking Plasters (large enough to cover the entire nipple area - buy skin coloured or similar on a roll)
  • Fabric (small off-cuts will do)
  • Tassels (available from any good haberdashery or craft shop)
  • Sequins (optional)
  • Beads (optional)


Method


  1. Make the base by cutting four nipple-sized discs from your fabric. Sew two discs together. (You may neaten each with a blanket stitched edge or by sewing front side to front side, reversing discs and invisibly finishing on new front).
  2. Attach the tassels by sewing them to the centre of each double disc.
  3. You may add sequins and beads to taste. These can be added by sewing them on (recommended) or by gluing them.
  4. Cover the back of the disc with double sided tape. Peel off tape just before application.



Fitting Your Nipple Tassels


  1. Nipples should be clean and dry.
  2. Firstly prepare the nipples to be used by placing a disc of sticking plaster over the nipples. This should be the same size as the nipple tassels.
  3. Peel off the backing of the tassels and stick them to the plaster. Press firmly onto each nipple. It is possible to stick the double-sided tape directly onto the nipples but this is not recommended.



IMPORTANT!

Not recommended for swimming.

The Unofficial Katie Price Website


Welcome to The Unofficial Katie Price Website




The supposed official website of Katie Price seems to be behind the times.  On 11th March 2010 the official Katie Price website’s latest update was 24th February 2010.  Meanwhile, this, the unofficial Katie Price website has been updated several times – the latest being a report of Katie Price landing at LAX  to spend 10 days with new husband Alex Reid and maybe get new teeth veneers and have her hair extensions redone.  CLICK HERE TO READ THAT REPORT 


What’s going on? 

It could be that the official Katie Price website is too much trouble to bother with.  Another theory is that it is not the money earner Katie Price expected it to be as nobody is prepared to pay the monthly fee of £3 to read her blog (more about this below) and, this being the case, so it has plummeted down the celebrity’s priority list.  Also worth consideration is that the website’s developer and, typical of most website developers, he or she has lost interest in the site and has moved to pastures new.  Perhaps he or she has lost the passwords – it happens. 


Unofficial Website – No Monthly Fee and Regular Updates

There is NO FEE to read Katie Price Gossip and Katie Price News on the unofficial Katie Price website.  In addition, the unofficial Katie price website is updated regularly.  What excellent value!


Official Website - Monthly Fee

To read Katie Price’s blog via the website will cost you £3 per month.  This fee is almost unprecedented.  Anyway, who in their right mind would pay £3 per month and possibly find that the blog isn’t updated either?   We wouldn’t.

Katie Price Flies to LA for Hair Extensions, Botox and Alex Reid



Katie Price in LA

The latest on Katie Price - solid news and not the made up rubbish from so called "insider sources" - is that Katie landed at LAX last night.



Who Was With Katie?

We know that the children were not with Katie and understand that ex husband Peter Andre will be looking after all three.  It is difficult to assess if Katie took her film crew with her as these often go unmentioned by other news sources reporting the latest on Katie Price.  Other news organisations don't like to give any free coverage to Katie's own TV coverage due to their conflict of interests.  (The same organisations spend money making stories up but that's a different story).

There is a small chance that Katie has gone to LA on her own without any staff or hangers on.  If this is so, this is a first.



What Will Katie Do in LA?

Katie Price does love LA and the facilities it offers.  Although Katie will still look for bargains when it comes to wrapping paper and horse supplies, when it comes to plastic surgery she pays for the best.  She gets the best in LA.



Botox Injections

Katie will likely have some more face filling injections while in LA.  This is where Botox was invented and where the most advances have been made.  It is probable that she will as she was seen and heard to complain of a line on the bridge of her nose on the Alan Carr chat show.  As this is the first time she has been in LA since chatting with Alan Carr we can safely assume that this will be one of her first treatments.



Hair Extensions and Teeth Veneers

LA is where Katie has had hair extensions fitted in the past.  However, as Katie Price now makes more use of hairpieces to achieve her latest look it is debatable if she'll spend any of her time in a LA Hair Salon.  Ditto the LA dentist she visits.  So what will Katie be doing?



Alex Reid

Katie Price will spend most of her time with her new husband.  This could be the nearest thing they get to a honeymoon.  Reports have said that Katie will be in LA for the next ten days.

Katie Price and Alex Reid | Marriage Problems



New Reports about Katie Price and Alex Reid

Yesterday saw several reports circulating about the state of Katie Price and Alex Reid's post-marriage relationship. At the bottom of all the authoritative reports is the tiniest piece of evidence which has been Chinese whispered, expanded and distorted to reveal its truth. These were in addition to the scoop published on this website about Katie Price's latest hairstyle CLICK HERE to read that.



The Reports and Reports to Expect

In other words the reports are completely untrustworthy, but hey, here they are and beneath them their logical conclusions which could be seen in more mainstream reports coming soon...


Alex Reid Made to Have Sex with Katie Price Three Times a Day

The report that Alex (the poor brainless man who does as he is told all the time) is being forced to have sex with Katie Price, three times a day, come rain or shine and he better not complain or he'll be made to do it again, come after other reports about the couple spending much time apart due to work commitments. With this unfortunate former report in mind we wish to add another report:


Alex Reid Made to Supply Sperm Donation | Expect this Report Soon


This "report" should be expected soon.  After declaring that Alex Reid is being made to have sex with Katie Price three times a day and the realisation that this is impossible due to the couple's separation due to onging work commitments, this so called report is a logical conclusion.  Expect an insider or anonymous friend to be in touch with the press soon about this, they will conveniently say that:
"Katie Price is forcing Alex Reid to supply her with sperm so she can attempt to impreganate herself three times a day with a turkey baster..."


Katie Price Forces Alex Reid to Dress Like Peter Andre and to Dump his Manager of 12 Years 


Reports that Katie Price is forcing Alex Reid to dress differently and that she forced him to dispense with his manager after twelve years came hot on the heals of another report that Katie followed Alex to Los Angeles, hot on his heals.  Alex himself denied that Katie is forcing him to dress like Peter Andre but he admitted that she suggested he spike his hair.  The latter is better overlooked and the best resort is to have an insider and anonymous friend give their opinion.  Expect this report from such a anonymous spokesperson soon:


Alex Reid Promises to do Everything Katie Price Tells Him 


An anonymous inside source said:
"Alex Reid has signed a secret contract with Katie Price and has also took an oath that he will do everything Katie Price tells him..."

Katie Price Her Latest Hairstyle Secretly Filmed

The First Look at Katie Price's New Hairstyle aka Her New Hairdo

Video footage, secretly filmed, has been released.  The footage clearly shows Katie Price's most astounding new hairstyle.  Apart from being the same colour (black) the hairstyle has nothing in common with Katie's penultimate hairdo which incorporated many hundreds of single strand, real hair extensions and three hairpieces.  The new look is entirely modest.

The hairstyle is revealed in the following, aforementioned secretly filmed, video footage.

Secretly Filmed Katie Price Video Footage




How to Achieve the New Look Katie Price Hairstyle

To achieve the new look Katie Price hairstyle, follow one of the methods described below:


METHOD 1

Wash and condition your hair using shampoo and hair conditioner.  You will need to use warm water.  You can do this by following the directions on the shampoo and hair conditioner bottles.  You can do this either in a bath full of warm water and use a cup, mug or jug to wet the hair (fill up the cup, mug or jug with warm water and pour it over your head) or while you are taking a shower (stand under the shower which should be turned on).  Another method is to have a hairdresser was your hair while your head is resting in a head bidet.

Blow dry your hair OR let it dry naturally.  TIP:  Comb or brush your hair to remove tangles while it is still wet.

When it is dry section the hair into two.  Put a parting down the middle to achieve the two sections.

Now the tricky bit.  Using two hair bands (covered elastic bands) put them in the position shown in the secretly filmed video footage featured above.


METHOD 2

Buy a wig like that worn by Katie Price in the secretly filmed video footage above and bung it on your head.  TIP:  use some hair grips or wig tape to secure the wig in place otherwise it might slip, cover your eyes and you might fall over or, if you are driving, this could lead to a nasty accident.



Alex Reid Wants Annulment of Marriage to Katie Price | The Truth


Reports About Alex Reid Wanting an Annulment of His Marriage to Katie Price 

Reports that Alex Reid wants an annulment of his marriage to Katie Price appear to have been made up.  The reports hale from an “insider” and an “anonymous friend of Alex” and should be treated as about as valid as reports of “brains found in snot”.  Instead of looking for truth in matters reported in the news by hungry journalists – journalists undergoing withdrawal symptoms from Katie Price real stories due to her clamming up to teach the cynical British press a lesson – you would be better employed looking into the many shortcomings of the aforementioned press.  Why do they "report" (to use the term loosely) so much claptrap?



Problems with the British Press

Stories like these are symptomatic of the sad state of the lower press in the UK.  Lower press journalists are paid to find stories and could actually do some good.  They could, for instance, look at stories about child abuse, power-crazy and corrupted officials and other stories which may benefit the country.  Instead most journalists sit around on their huge flabby arses, fiddle with their thumbs and come up with stories which could be true.



“Insider” and “Anonymous Friends” Reports

Sources quoted as being “insider” or “anonymous friends” do serve a purpose but not when it comes to celebrity gossip.  Such sources are useful when, for instance, trying to prove that Tony Blair was a warmonger who longed to go down in History.  However, when it comes to celebrity news they are a total waste of time and there should be measures to stop their use. 



The British Press is Sexist

The British press is misogynist (women hating).  It overlooks the opinion, experience and social position of women unless it is doing it some harm.  It is a jealous press out to score points against Katie Price because she's got more money than them.



Coming Soon to Katie Price Gossip

The next story which will appear on this website will be based on the techniques of the press as used to start the rumour about Alex Reid and the annulment he wants from Katie Price.  Expect something ridiculous but also expect something more.  What more cannot be divulged yet but, should the experiment work, not only will it be fun…